Category Archives: Pagany Goodness

Back into the Swing

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Blocked by my fears and worldly responsiblies I need to just work though this.

Trying to get back into the habit of things, lots of things. Part of my past year has been dealing with Fibro. I got the results from my MRI. Clean. That’s awesome but it means that this is part of the Fibro/PCOS/Hypo cocktail that is my physical problem.

Basically this is yoga, meditation and daily tarot. Stop screaming. I know I should be meditating with Fibro. I’m working on it. I really am.

I got a new phone, the MyTouch4G and wow. I love it! Visual voicemail, facebook, twitter and contacts have all been integrated. It has a great battery life; I have not run it down once using in for over 12 hours. I keep the screen dimmed though but it’s a very bright screen. Also I downloaded

Lots of people to deal with and lots of people to be.

more apps for it than my old phone since it has way more space. One of the apps I found was Insight Meditation app which allows you to set bells during the mediation and times the meditation. It all so lets you log the meditation notes as well. If you’ve been reading my blog for while then you may remember that I went through an Insight meditation course awhile back. It’s nice to just set the timer and meditate where ever I am.

Will have time for my own creative journey today.

I’ve started tracking my dreams. Again an app called Dream Journal. I find it pretty easy to type on the phone with the keyboard. Don’t have to tap I can just draw a line through the letters and it brings up the word.

Getting back into doing full daily tarot readings. I suppose it was fear that made me stop. Just after Aia got that near deadly infection. The spreads you see in this post are done with the Intuitive tarot over the last nine days. Going from yearly large spreads an only daily one card pulls to full readings feels so much better.

Another Creative day. Will have to deal with some worldly issues as well.

Also posting on this blog. I want to get into posting five days a week. I feel much better once that happens. I expect to attach a reading to every post. I feel like I’ve been quiet with no reason. Silly, no?

With going to the land, packing, laundry, work and writing, the cards are as spazed out as I am.

I renewed my BOTA membership. Can’t wait to start that again. The fool card is from the BOTA tarot. I colored it using acrylic paints. Came out well I thought. Speaking of painting, miniatures!!!! I have a ton to take pictures of and more to paint. I’ve got a full mouseguard set to paint as well. I want to use them for my con games. I may miss most of Tacticon this year, but by Genghis, I plan to have the rules for my fantasy system all worked out. I will get back to posting that on Wednesdays starting next week.

I’ve almost finished a scarf and hat set for Aia’s Schweethart monkey. I’m working on a my first knitted shawl. And I have another 2oz of yarn spun!! Rose pink wool from that same felting wool set I’m practicing on. It’s pretty and will go into the remnants blanket I will be starting soon. I have poodle fur from a friend. This will be the first fur I’ll have to card myself. Since I have carding brushes (RE: Large dog brushes). I can’t wait to try. I think I may have enough to make a scarf out it for the friend who gave it me. My spinning is much more consistent now. I do want to get a lace weight spindle for the soy fiber I have also waiting to be spun.

Painted with acrylics, BOTA Fool

Tatting has eluded me. I did finally get the flip and got the knots on the right string. However I haven’t’ been practicing enough and I still can’t get a circle without accidental picots. May I can bring that book with me today. We’re going down to the land tonight. First time in the new house. At least for me. My work schedule has been keeping me from most weekend pursuits. J. took the next two days off so we could go.

All in all things are going well. I am nearly done with my first complete novel. I screwed up and did the revisions on paper first. I will never do that again. Live and learn I guess. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. My current goal is to get that send out by the beginning of August. I am excited. I have been working on the second novel AND a few short stories. I think I will have to trunk Get ‘em Where You Can. I have no markets left to send it to though the response to it has been good it still hasn’t been accepted. It did win honorable mention in the Writer’s of the Future contest. Go me.

Apprentice to Power by Timothy Roderick

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The interesting thing about Apprentice to Power is how it is put together. Unlike other books on Wicca, this book uses each chapter as a theme, and then tells the story of the lesson via parables of the author’s teachers. Each chapter ends with some practical exercise.

Each story is personal and a lesson with in a story. While each story was interesting, spellings of gods, names were creative and not always the right god that the text attributed it. For instance, the difference between Syn and Sin is cultural, gender and purpose.

Overall, the book was interesting to read. I recommend it for its approach to a topic that rarely contains examples.

I Am Not My Ancestors Daughter

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The recent hoopla about Hemdall being cast as Idris Elba is strange. One side attacks from the racist view that their ancestors had and the other from the atheist and/or christian view that those gods don’t really exist. Let’s pretend the world is sane at the moment.

1. It’s a comic book movie. Comic books were and are in some cases very un PC. Thor, in the Marvel Universe (which isn’t ours btw) is a blond exiled being of a race of Alien super beings. This is called fiction and frankly as long Idris Elba does a good job of acting our the part of alien Hemdall then I’m for it. The only worry I have for this movie is that it dissolves into silliness. I have hope since Marvel took the most boring superhero they had and made him fun and engaging. There are various versions of Hemdall in Marvel comics. In fact the one in Thor Mighty Avenger is black.

2. We are not our ancestor’s children. Let me be clear. My family comes from Northern and Eastern Europe. We’re Scots (French Dane), Belgium, Danish, English, German and Ukrainian. I’ve made no bones about being pagan. However I’m not beholden to all my ancestors beliefs. The argument that our ancestors did not mix race holds no water today and is racist. Is that really something we should hold on to? No. Unequivocally no.

Idris Elba, as far as I’m concerned is an actor. He’s had a long career in TV and movies. I haven’t seen any of his previous work but I expect him to act the part assigned, which is that of the protector of Asgard. So unless the director can’t get past the silly of the Thor comic, and directs actors to act like they were in the Phantom Menace, I’m pretty sure Idris Elba will do a great job.

Amethyst Diving

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Last week I was in Lake Havasu visiting the family, and swimming and other combinations of those two. Mostly I came back tired and burnt, but hey, it was fun.

The last day of swimming in the channel next to the London Bridge, I did some rock diving. One specific rock diving: Amethyst. I’ve found it all around the lack, channel and even up river during previous trips. Not to be disappointed this time, I managed to find some whole amethyst chunks as well as some mixed specimens.

These are not gem grade rocks. They are pretty, mostly when wet. I’m thinking about polishing them up a bit though. We’ll see. Oh? That picture is me and the kids riding behind Dad’s boat.

We’re silly that way.

God of Fear and Death

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The god of death walks up to you and says if you don’t worship me you will be tortured endlessly when you die. If you do then I’ll let you continue to exist without pain.

When I think about gods, I’m thinking about crazy powerful beings which have way better things to do then grant wishes and guide us. In fact, if a god or goddess is looking your way and sticking their finger in the soup of life, you’d be better off running for the hills.

I don’t have relationship with gods. That’s bat-shit crazy in my book. I know other people do it. That’s fine. You have your go.

That’s why, when people praise Yahweh I wonder some silly thoughts. Yahweh offers what exactly? You have to love him, worship him and only him. And what does that get you? If you don’t do it you burn forever…or, as some Christian believe, you all end up in heaven with everyone else who has been forgiven by Jesus Christ and are suddenly better people.

This is all when you die. It doesn’t actually affect your life. Okay I know some folks say it does..just in making you a better person. I guess.

My point, I guess, is why follow someone who tells you worship me or else? Can you honestly say that fear of death doesn’t play a role in this? If some one walked up to you and said be my friend or I’ll tie you up and torture you…would you do it? I’d fight this person with everything I have. Would you submit and hope to get out later?

Why worship a god of death unless you feared him? And who are you who would worship the god of death out of love?

Breath and Dots

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Breathing, as in, in and out, nose and mouth. It’s calming, it focuses it’s what I like to do. You can feel the earth move, the stars shift and just relax.

Dots, as in pictures, tell stories that you have to learn to see. They are minimalist drawings of freedom and wind and rain and everything you ever need to know.

My favorite meditation recently has just been simple breathing. No visualization, no words, no music. Just breath. Yesterday I added a dot to the picture.

It’s like flavors in tea.

Upsetting Words

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It amazes some times what various Wicca books still assume.

So I’m on day 2 of the year and the day.  They want my reaction to certain words dubbed Upsetting Words.

The words are:  Wicca, Witchcraft, Earth Religion, Power, Occult, Magic, Ritual, Spell and Pagan.

My reaction:  So?  I’ve been a pagan all my life.  These aren’t new.  There’s a small percentage of the population that has a coniption when some of these words are mentioned but most people just give them a pass as normal.

Wicca has been around for at least 50 years.  Most modern pagan movements have been around at least 40 if not longer.   Why don’t we include children in training and what we do?  Why are children excluded from group work, books etc.

The availablity on this material is ifantestemly small.

But back to the point…shouldn’t we have a population that has grown up pagan?

First of all, there is.  But generally we are dismised as liers or over shadowed by the dick-size envy crowd who talks about ancient family practices that sound just like wicca.

But are they raising their children as pagans?  Why the hell not?  Sigh.

Any way the words….my reaction:  And?

They are words.  I use them in the connotaion that they are every day things for me.  That’s all.

B.O.T.A Initiation and Earth Meditation

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I completed the BOTA initiation ritual yesterday, which both serves to dedicate the self and the space in a special.  I found it empowering and uplifting.

I also did an earth connection meditation via the year and the day book.  It was interesting and nice.  It’s the kind of meditation that just makes you feel good.  I got about a third of the way into it though when my daughter started singing about her homework…loudly.

Use the ipod, dammit.

Aw well.  I was pleasently surprised to find that after a long hiatus since regular meditation, that I could still slip right into it.  I could feel the breeze, the earth, the rock, the animals, the trees, and it felt well.

So it begins.

Year Card: Justice

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fjusticeSo the card for this year is Justice. Why?

2+0+0+9 = 11

And I prefer Justice in the 11 position.

I don’t have the hubris to know who’s justice it’ll be or if overall the scales will balance out.  This will be an interesting year.

My own resolutions are simple:  get things done.  Study Japanese, write words, read, paint and get some pagan study done.  I want to do another Hallowquest.  The time for that draws near.  I have the BOTA to work on, and I’m putting myself through a Wicca 101 course.  Why because I can and because its a good way to explore various things.  It’s been nearly ten years since I went through a year and day initiate training, which I completed then walked away from instead of joing the coven.  Something tells me to do it again.  I don’t have any illusions, I’m not going to suddenly become Wiccan nor join a coven.   But in the past several years my life in paganism has dwindled.  I officially have room to work again…time to use it.

I think a year of Justice is a good time to re-center oneself…don’t you?

Labor Day Weekend ’08

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So this weekend was Tacticon. Three of my games went off. It looks like the Vampire Hunters left Kilkore and the crew of the Winding Leaf added to the their list of felonies three-fold. It’s definitely a complete weekend when some one groans, “Oh I remember this moral dilemma, thanks.”It is an interesting social experiment how often gamers will choose to break the law for the greater good at the gaming table. I wonder how that translates in real life.

I got to play 4th ed. It plays like a video game, which was no surprise. It was fun, if totally combat oriented. In fact the rogue I played wasn’t good at much of anything but combat. For the first time in playing a 1st level rogue being hit with 22 hp of damage I got to yell, “I’m still alive!” And so the game progressed. I took over 100 hp of damage total and lived the majority of the night through it. It was great.

But it’s not DnD. It just isn’t. The names are there but it doesn’t work with the same flow as 1st, 2nd or 3rd ed. It is fun, it’s not the same. I can safely say no LFR for me, but I’ll play the classics as they’re offered.

I did finish chapter 13, and I’ve got a good deal done on chapter 21. Things are flying now and that eee PC is just great for this.

On Monday I finally removed that wallpaper. It took all of 20 minutes. I got the bed broke down and half the room cleaned out. Goal: by the end of the week be ready to dedicate the space. Woot! Of course it turns out that the wall is a different color under the wallpaper. Go them. I’ll have to think on solutions to this.

I also made Chicken stock. Clean-out-your-fridge chicken stock is easy. You need a half eaten whole chicken…mine was lemon pepper flavored, carrots, potatoes, peas, perl onions, garlic, cumin, curry, bay leaves, thyme, savory, salt, pepper, some Mrs Dash, water, whisky, vodka, white wine, liquid smoke, red pepper and two bullion cubes. Then boil the hell out of it for 3 hours or until it tastes good. Then remove all solid matter, feed the carrots and some of the potatoes to the dogs, the rest get’s composted but you can eat it all (except the bones) if you’re not on a diet. And you have chicken stock…num.

What else? That’s mostly it right now. I have web page stuff to do and more writing.