I’ve been dreading the blog this week.

I won’t even pull a tarot card, I’m that scared.

My baby came to me with a little bit of puffy in her face and complaints of a head ache. 24hrs and $500 dollars later we find out I got her in the doctor in time but her life and her eye are still in danger.

There are positives.

She’s playing

She’s desparately hungry, despit the vomiting.

Today you can see her eye again.

She hasn’t had any fever.

These are all good things. But she has now four doctors watching her. All of them warning me that any change will result in a trip to the emergency room. Which if it gets to that point it doesn’t leave them optimistic.

So as uninsured Americans, we’re worried. I’ve put $500 on my credit card, $300 of that was for medication, which I had to try 5 pharmacies before finding one that carried it. Even then they only had part of the dosage. I had to wait another 24hrs before they could get the rest.

I’m glad that I have a good team of doctors. This is not a repeat of the 2002 pnemonia which gripped Aia and I from Dec 2001 till May 2002Having to throttle doctors who just kept telling me to come back when her tempurature was a little higher, as if 104 isn’t high, was not fun.. They all came to talk with Aia and inform me of what was going on. Her condition is rare. Our physician was the only one in the office which had every seen a case of this and that was more than 15 years ago. The infection has spread into her body but not her blood. I got her there in time. They gave her two shots of antibiotics right away and almost at third today but they didn’t want to overwhlem her body.

I’m seriously thinking of revoking visitation rights for the ex. This is the second deadly situation he’s put her in. Pnemonia came from his need for a booty callThat sounds sicker than it actually is…he brought Aia with him to see his then girl friend, her daughter was sick and it transmitted to Aia., and she recieved this infection while at his house.

But that’s a whole well of problems I can’t think about right now. I’m trying not hide under the covers like I want to. I called a lot of people yesterday just to talk about it so I could sleep last night.

Tonight, bills…then tomarrow I’ll figure out what I need to do get groceries.

I hate stress.

After yesterday’s visit I took Aia out to eat with a left over gift certificate from my new jobI forgot to mention in my 2006 review I lost the cruddy stupid job and got a new much more artfantastic one.. With her face swollen and her legs numb (They gave her a shot in each leg which also contained numbing medication for pain); forced into a pigeon toed position with her rapid had movents when things hurt, she looked like a down syndrome childI know that’s a bad sentance, go fuck yourself..

I gave up trying to explain when they said things like, “How wonderful that you bring her out in public.” What could I say, “Down syndrome doesn’t strike in 24hrs” or “If you had only seen her wednsday you’d know she’s normal”. Luckily the numbness and the swelling had subsided a bit. I can see her eye today and she can see me with it..despite the blood.

I’m going to go work now. Then I don’t know. I’ve missed time with no pay and I have no insurance yet. I’m sure I’ll make it, so will my daughter.