body of water under white sky

Reflection on Good Things in a Year of Pain

It’s funny how this works.

This time last year, I was suffering immense physical pain. I was isolated from everyone I knew both in quarantine and distance. Oh yeah, and Winnie died. Surgery was imminent. I had to go to physical therapy for my face. People all around the world seemed to be embroiled in disease, violence, and racism.

And yet.

My current stalker card

I wrote the above over a month ago with the intention of finishing the post in the next day. What I didn’t know then was life was going to take another baseball bat to my life.

Okay. Let me circle back to why I made this post.

Things are getting back to a kind of faux-normal. Different for some. No so for others. For me, I didn’t suddenly have boundless free time during the pandemic. I didn’t know anyone who did. I was already working from home, and so, had to keep working. Last year was hard. Despite the bad good things happened.

I made new friends. We started Metaphysical Times. It grew/is growing like crazy. I got a chance to leave the country for a week. Got vaccinated. Found a boyfriend.

The best part of last year though? The zoom calls. I got to meetups I never would have. I hung out with friends I left behind when I moved. Now as things open or at least waffle over closing again, I miss those calls. I wish some would stick around. Made the world seem a little smaller.

There was a period of time last year when it seemed like everyone was sharing what they had. And it was great, but the darkness soon closed over again so people hid away.

I wish they hadn’t.

I had to have another abdominal surgery this year, and some heavy relationship trouble. I’m starting to feel the isolation again.

What to do about that? I’m spending more time with things that bring me joy. Starting classes on tarot and witchcraft, teaching at least. Writing has been tough in the last year, but I’m trying. Maybe that has passed me by…I hope not.

A writer is a person for whom writing is more difficult than it is for other people.Thomas Mann






Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Copyright 2023 MJN