Well, So Much for That.

It hasn’t happened for awhile, but every once in a while the single mom thing bites you in the ass.

Having lost whole groups of friends, potential boyfriends, potential jobs and even a husband over having a child my hackles rise really quick when some suggests that I ditch the child because they are uncomfortable.

1. I am very clear that I have a child when I join things.
2. I am very open to discussion even though my child is in the room. The basis being I turned out fine.

So when that crit group decided that they felt uncomfortable and I should find “alternative care” for Aia as the group was “adult time”. Well that was it. I had other problems, which felt all ironed out after the last two meetings. However they didn’t bother to bring that up. So fine. I’m not going to play that game. Aia is a smart girl, she is not to be shuttled off due the uncomfortable nature of other humans.

During Mexico I was accused of not giving up adult time. But then said accusers wouldn’t give up my daughter when I planned to have her for a night or two. Aia has a history of not telling the full story to get her way. She told her grandparents that she was staying with them. I told her she was staying with me but she could ask. After all, I thought, they will just say no, since I told them I would be taking her. But of course they just took her and yelled at me later (her whole basis was that she wanted to go out that night but she already had CJ so she wasn’t going out regardless). How hard is it to say no? So I make an extra big effort to take her back to my room for the night but then the grandma walks in and destroys all that prep with “She can stay with great-grandma tonight”, great. I destroyed my plans for that night got all ready to stay in with my daughter and play games and suddenly my daughter is given the idea that she can go with great-grandma instead. Which is instant fitsville. My mother probably thought she was doing me a favor. What she never gets is how much hell she puts me through to the point that when she gets around to the favor all it really does is destroy all the work I put into making things right. So I didn’t party with my family or play with my daughter that night. Instead I stayed in, drew, and watched weird strippers on Mexican vh1. Which was a pretty good time. 🙂

But I digress. Making adult time usually surrounds time with the BF which usually coincides with Aia being at the ex’s. This weekend is an exception. Due to picnic funness and summer madness, she’ll be at the great grandparents. So I’ll take some time to be with J.

People without kids don’t get it. If you’re one of those you’re probably reading this thinking that I’m just being a bitch about it all. Hell, maybe I am. But when you have a child, or even when a child is thrust into your realm of responsibility a chemical trigger goes off. Suddenly things that were okay as childless person are now not only taboo but also insane.

I don’t expect you to get it. But you can’t expect me to put up with it. Deal.